And I'm Back!

At the prodding of my mother I am going to finally complete the blog I have been working on for a week now. It takes practice, but I have a feeling all the down time I will have in the next few weeks will produce many more blogs.

I have mono. Which is AWESOME. Can you sense the sarcasm dripping off of that one? So yeah, I will have a good amount of time to write blogs. You're welcome mom.

For those of you who don't know, the world lost two young men to sucide in October. While I only knew one, I feel the loss of the Trinity family like I knew both. I can't presume to know all that went into the decision of these boys, and some may say I'm insensitive for even writing about it, but I promise I have a point. From what I understand, bullying of some sort was a factor in both. This absolutely breaks my heart. For two CHILDREN under the age of 13 to think that there is no hope, no way out breaks my heart beyond what I can put into words.

As a girl who has never really fit in, I can understand their pain. I too was bullied in school. I still am, to a certain extent. I don't mean that people tease me or taunt me like they used to, but they certainly don't accept me and they talk about me behind my back like I can't hear them or find out what they say. Believe me, I hear you. You have no idea what you are talking about. Before you go "not respecting" someone, maybe you should find out the reasons behind their decisions. Just saying.

But onto my point. I often don't think about the impact my words have on people. Just last night I said something that I REALLY shouldn't have, for multiple reasons. Yes I was hurting and sick and upset, but that didn't excuse my behavior. I immediately apologized, but that didn't make it better. It really got me thinking about all the kids out there who repeatedly get abused by their peers, verbally and otherwise. Things are worse now than they've ever been, and certaintly worse than they were when I was younger, what with facebook, myspace, twitter, texting, and the like. There are so many options for bullies now that its almost easier not to be one. You can insult someone with the click of a button and never get caught. It's scary to think about really.

I really want to send out a PSA of sorts.
To my peers: yes we are older now, but that doesn't mean we watch our mouths any more than we used to. Please think about what you say. Yes we are all stronger now, but you never know when something you say to be funny could send someone over the edge. Yes some of you feel the need to insult your way to self confidence, but true self confidence can only come from loving yourself, not hating others.
To the adults: please educate your children on the impact of their words. You never know when a simple "if you can't say anything nice, don't say nothing at all" can save one child's life. Love your children. Hug them every day. And let them know there is hope.
To the kids: you now are painfully aware of the impact of words. Please love each other. You don't have to like each other, but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE respect each other. If you feel like there is no hope, please tell a teacher, a friend, a parent, a sibling, someone. There is hope, I promise. As someone who has been pretty low, I PROMISE it gets better. If someone tells you they are thinking about killing themself, PLEASE tell someone. Even if you think it's a joke, it could save heartache of many.

That's all for now. Sorry to be so depressing right out of the gate. Love you all!